- What are your deal breakers?
- What would cause you to 'break fellowship' with the leaders or the people of your church?
- Would your reasons be theological, inter-personal or behavioral?
Early in my walk with the Lord I attended a church for 18 years and left hurt, wounded and 'unheard' - that last word is especially important. Being 'heard' is a very relational thing ... wanting to be involved in a fellowship where leaders know you and need you ... it is so subtle but hits to the core of the body of Christ. I am reminded of this passage:
But now God has placed the members, each one of them, in the body, just as He desired. If they were all one member, where would the body be? But now there are many members, but one body. And the eye cannot say to the hand, "I have no need of you"; or again the head to the feet, "I have no need of you." (1 Corinthians 12:18-21)Ever felt unneeded? It is a sorrowful feeling because it hits us where we live - we all want to be part of a group where people care about us and want our input. How many church leaders have subtly (or not so subtly) changed 'church' because 'God said'? In some weird way, for some, amputation has become an acceptable practice in Christianity. It seems that losing body parts doesn't make much of a difference to some churches. When people leave the church many rationalize it away blaming God with words like "God led them". It is a sad commentary on the way that we do church these days.
All that said, I do not want to leave on a negative note. For many (myself included) church is a place of life, where you genuinely love your brothers and sisters in Christ and in turn feel loved by them. We are currently selecting a new lead pastor for our fellowship and the atmosphere feels welcoming and inviting. Elders making the decision have had many conversations with the members of our body. The two men being considered for the position are people who love people and are genuinely concerned for the well being of our church. Some people may leave but I think that it will not be because they are unheard ... but I could be wrong.