I’m torn between two desires ...
I trust that my life will bring honor to Christ, whether I live or die. For to me, living means living for Christ, and dying is even better. But if I live, I can do more fruitful work for Christ. So I really don’t know which is better. I’m torn between two desires: I long to go and be with Christ, which would be far better for me. But for your sakes, it is better that I continue to live. Knowing this, I am convinced that I will remain alive so I can continue to help all of you grow and experience the joy of your faith. -Philippians 1:20-25 NLT
For a Christian, the main thing in life is living for Someone who is greater than life itself. It reminds me how Paul writes to the Corinthians that each of us, on the cross of Christ, were bought with a price and therefore should honor God with our bodies. The concept of honor and integrity plays out in our lives every day in the way that we walk out the values that we know in our hearts to be true. Honoring God is usually about doing the small things that no one ever sees.
Can you relate to Paul's dilemma? Has life ever been so hard that you simply wanted to die and be with Jesus in heaven? I have known that experience. Sometimes the only thing that keeps us tied to this life is our responsibilities to the ones that we love. The parent lives for the needs of the child. The caregiver for the life of the one that they love so much. It is a way that Paul, and many others since, have honored God by putting the needs of others before their own.
Help us to awake each day Lord Jesus knowing that our lives are not our own and that we are called to live for you.