spiritual deconstruction

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Spiritual deconstruction is the process of critically examining and potentially rejecting long-held religious beliefs, practices, and identities. It's a journey of re-evaluation, not necessarily a rejection of faith itself, but rather a questioning of what no longer aligns with one's personal values and sense of self. This can involve questioning doctrines, rituals, and even the way one understands God. 

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I have developed a theology that unravels almost all of my many years of orthodoxy.

I laugh, and sometimes cry, when I think of the strict dogma that shaped my early years.

For so many years I spent so much time thinking that:

1) God is perfect and in control;

2) the bible was a spiritual roadmap to knowing and understanding God; 

3) humankind was in need of blood atonement when love was the real need;

4) the church, with its rites, sacraments and theology, had real answers.

I have come to believe that what humankind needed (and needs) is love. Loving neighbors. Loving enemies - even religious ones. IMO, it is enough for me to equate God with love and love with God. All else is dross. And a God of love is impossible to comprehend with the brain because love can only be experienced with the heart.

That said, please know that I still sense the presence of God in my life. It might be just misfiring neurons to some, but I hear him speak to me with a kindness that breaks me. With a love that sees me. In my darkest days, I sense his spirit encouraging me to hang in there and simply take another step.

Of course, it is not the science that many seek. IMO, science and history only show us our problems. They offer very few answers. There in, is the rub. Why fixate on the natural when there may be other things more important? Things like loving our neighbor.

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... this devotion is part of a series on my spiritual deconstruction. Click here to read more.